HERE COMES FREDDY WITH SOME DUMB AU PROMPTS

• i really want to go to this concert but my friend bailed and i don’t have a car so i’m hitchhiking and you were the only person that stopped, so will you take me there? i’ll even give you the extra ticket 
  
• you work the customer service desk at a local department store and i keep buying stuff that i don’t need just so i can return it and talk to you and i’m pretty sure you’re tired of seeing me every other day but i promise i’m not an insane shopaholic i just really enjoy talking to you
• i accidentally ran into your car from behind and first off, oh my god i’m so sorry; secondly, i know you just gave me your number for legal reasons but you’re pretty cute and i might take advantage of this 
• we never got along in high school or college and now i’m working as a prison guard and you’re a new inmate but i know you were wrongfully convicted and i’m a bleeding fuckin’ heart so i feel obligated to help you 
• you’re a highly successful & influential person and i’m a professional assassin that was hired to date you and learn your secrets before killing you but i think i have feelings for you now? haha oops 
• you passed out on my front porch and you reek of booze but i live in the middle of nowhere and also who are you???
• my mom tried to set me up with someone over the phone but i told her i was already seeing someone else and that was a lie but, see, i’m going to my parents’ house for the weekend and they really want to meet this person so will you pretend to be my date? 
• we’re both high school teachers serving as chaperones for a school trip and our students kinda ship us and i think they somehow rigged the hotel rooms so we have to share one? and i’m so sorry in advance because i snore 
• i’ve been waiting for this library book to be returned for AGES because i really wanna read it and apparently you still have it so i’m gonna track you down and get it myself. i don’t even care if i have to pay the fees; i just want the fucking book 
• i work at a convenience store that you frequent and i swear to god if i see you put something back where it doesn’t belong ONE MORE TIME…